Musings

So, anyway, I was thinking, like, I already mentioned this yesterday. Like, I think kids are supposed to do certain things. However, they want to literally prevent other people from doing them. }:( I think it's just because of the "n" word thing, though, and am mad because I won't know how things really are... when they really are? So, anyway, I think it's still a prevailing issue. It doesn't make sense. I don't know how they got there. Maybe, it is funny I ever watched what I watch, which has mostly been "The Ellen DeGeneres Show." I wanted to go out and get a job, but because of the "n" word thing and other things I was unable to. Now, my mom said to just volunteer. I lost my papers to volunteer at the museum. So, I dunno, maybe I will look for them but not sure if I have them. I think I signed up to volunteer at 2 other places. One is like social work. The other is a weekly bar doing wrist bands or construction at a movie theater.

Also, I contacted Walt Disney World about knowing when there is an opening to work at Ellen's Universe of Energy. However, I don't know how good I would be. You'd have to be contatined. Also, they probably do not favor people with black hair. I don't know what to do about my hair. I should jog in the day more. It used to be lighter, even when I didn't jog in the day. I took more baths for a long time, sometimes hours, days in a row. It even used to have little white highlights and like light reddish tints a lot. Once, it was straight and like a light reddish color, but I got rid of the picture thinking more would come. I hadn't taken a shower for a few days. This was in 2008. I remember also it used to have a maroon tint. However, it was more see-through, then, anyway, as it's been a lot of my life.

It's just the base is so dark. It's kinda nice, but it seems a bit fake, in some ways. I guess I'm getting uncomfortable. I mostly wish it was lighter growing up and my eyes. Sure, being dark can be cute, but why just keep getting darker?

Today might be a good day to stay home, not sure why.

So, my hair. I will make a conscious effort to jog during the day. Also, I need something in my room so I can watch "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" over and over, like in my leisure.

Jogging in the day lightens it pretty quickly, for some reason. Sometimes, it's smooth. I wish it were bouncy.

I'm glad I'm getting thinner from strict dieting and working out. I wonder how much "fake meat" they have at the grocery store, the health store, Whole Foods. I don't really feel like not eating meat, though. I grew up having a lot of chicken. Maybe, I should get more fish and beef. Maybe, at some point, I will be a vegetarian. I kinda don't feel the need to have meat other than fish. I don't really understand how you could go vegan without being very strict or having like unusual opportunities. I haven't had milk much growing up, so ... that's what I drink, now. I should have more tea, too. I was having that for awhile but not like 3 kettles like I heard someone said on the Soapbox on IMDb. I guess fake meat makes sense and is admirable and supplementary. I should probably get some. I used to like soy burgers. I don't know about the ingredients, but Whole Foods sells natural products.

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