Sunday, September 16, 2012
Dream
So, the feeling was... I dunno, kinda ready I guess. It's like it just happened. I forget what I was gonna say! It was kinda a close feeling, honestly not as close as close could be but still close. It's the only time I've dreamed of feeling like this, something not along the lines of a metally feeling, which also I don't feel much readily in any dream.
Dream
It was a nice dream. I've felt highly stimulated, at first by Tim Burton and then I suppose increasingly about his daughter. I'm pretty mad about it.
So, no Ellen DeGeneres|Tim Burton this time. Wait, yea, Tim Burton was supposed to be there. There was one time I went into the bathroom, I guess 3 other people there, one Helena Bonham Carter, who've I've eventually channeled mentally. I was looking for Tim Burton in the shower, and because of the nature of what I knew was a dream I said, "Dad?" Only Helena Bonham Carter was there, and in the dream, though I didn't figure any private parts was naked.
So, I guess, for some reason I had a preprogrammed reaction to her and felt more in this dream than any other. I didn't feel a lot, like you'd think. It was just a sorta emotional feeling. I was connecting because I thought I was Polish and Swiss Jewish from my dad's mom, and her mom is mostly Jewish.
So, like, maybe 30 times, I went up to her and put my arm around her waist because she was there and I did like her. She put her arm around my shoulders each time. I think I was like calling her mom because of the dream. I dunno. It's hard to describe the feeling...
At one point, my mom threw my white laundry on the bed, and for some reason I thought that was real. I was listening to my classical music on iTunes radio, and she told me to wake up, her and my dad, and have hamburgers. Since it was hamburgers, I went out to the kitchen twice. I thought something evil and told them halfway, like sorta, in anger, to make up for an excuse for feeling stimulated but did not mean it.
This might seem scary, but it was like I woke up and felt that pins and needles feeling, all staticy, along my torso, from Helena Bonham Carter in her pretend anger. Then, I was in Alice in Wonderland with her running as a Queen with me like on my torso. I was feeling silly but not disgusting. It was as though that was when I first encountered her in the dream, though, somehow.
Later, I kept going up to her. It was nice. I guess she was rubbing my shoulder and like hugging me each time, each time a little different. I didn't feel that sorta metallic feeling, at all, more a mellow scratchy feeling. It was a bleak setting. I went out to run, with a big calendar by the day with little papers you can tear off or write in for something and leg lifts. The other thing was some opposite. For some reason, I still heard music and had a hard time. It was that way with my parents, too. I found in my ear were little microphones, rather headphones. I kept reaching in and pulling them out and became antsy because still no luck. So, I was being made fun of racially, I think. I went back to her and like drawled "mom" to her and put my arm around her waist, her pretend kind of waist, and she put her arm around me. Eventually, I was better.
There was one time, when she was pregnant, had a big stomach especially up and down, kinda fat like me. That was kinda sad for me because I had to go away. She already had 2 kids, though, so I dunno.
So, then, I guess we were at some sort of meeting. She was probably carrying me, yes, in a scary setting that was kinda demented I think. I know I was sleeping in bed with my brother, next to my grandma. She said my brother would be a girl indian, and he gave in, like heaved a sigh. I was worried my grandma would kill me. Her face was looking flat and rounded on the side like a mask and not very thick. She looked a bit unhealthy like me and shriveled. I was in bed with them twice. I called my brother a nigger virtually but indirectly just to make him feel better because I obviously was very mad, told my parents, who saw, and it worked. There was one time we were up, not many times, not much time, and my grandma was like slurping water from the ground. Her face was flat with a flat nose and mid section sticking out, her nose with another bump at an angle at her forehead. She smiled approvingly like she was tricking me. She was doing it for some reason I don't know. She was tricking, but it wasn't for me, I believe. :( That's what I wanted to think, that it wasn't at all for me.
So, I guess I was sorta eventually wallowing in my race to Helena Bonham Carter but in a mature way completely on my part and hers. I think she was picking me up|carrying me. I don't know how realistic it was, not very tangible. Eventually, it became a bit violent and she went away turning into a long, slim, tubey, somewhat thick, red dragon, but she came back and put her arm around me again a few times or for awhile.
So, the highlight was feeling a reaction from her without doing anything after feeling about 4 times pins and needles after I got mad about her and she entered my dream.
It was just so nice that I just kept feeling comfort from her, kept putting my arm around her, and she cuddled me really, pretty satisfying, safe, and consistent, yet in reality it was disgruntling. It was nice when she hugged me, too, made me feel just a little silly in a way. Nothing big. It was just nice, I mean, just that kinda tint.
She was totally accepting of me and totally free, no questions about it. I guess I was just feeling sick from the brain scan as aforementioned. I haven't been able to make a trip to the grocery store, neither. My dad was busy 3 days in a row I think 2 weeks ago, too, and haven't submitted to my last casting agency maybe or maybe some others. I have some hope for sometime. I've been feeling violent toward various factions but not bad, just imperfect. I'm sorta irritated, I guess.
So, it was just nice. I went up and put my arm around her and before the shower scene called her "mom" just because. It was the way the family was, whatever it was, in the dream. She was very comforting. How big was she to me? She was very big, not very tall. Sometimes, like a few inches taller. I just felt settled yet stimulated in a way that was okay and good each time. It was sorta like a spot, though, on the side, for some reason. I didn't think about it. Like, maybe almost a foot big.
So, no Ellen DeGeneres|Tim Burton this time. Wait, yea, Tim Burton was supposed to be there. There was one time I went into the bathroom, I guess 3 other people there, one Helena Bonham Carter, who've I've eventually channeled mentally. I was looking for Tim Burton in the shower, and because of the nature of what I knew was a dream I said, "Dad?" Only Helena Bonham Carter was there, and in the dream, though I didn't figure any private parts was naked.
So, I guess, for some reason I had a preprogrammed reaction to her and felt more in this dream than any other. I didn't feel a lot, like you'd think. It was just a sorta emotional feeling. I was connecting because I thought I was Polish and Swiss Jewish from my dad's mom, and her mom is mostly Jewish.
So, like, maybe 30 times, I went up to her and put my arm around her waist because she was there and I did like her. She put her arm around my shoulders each time. I think I was like calling her mom because of the dream. I dunno. It's hard to describe the feeling...
At one point, my mom threw my white laundry on the bed, and for some reason I thought that was real. I was listening to my classical music on iTunes radio, and she told me to wake up, her and my dad, and have hamburgers. Since it was hamburgers, I went out to the kitchen twice. I thought something evil and told them halfway, like sorta, in anger, to make up for an excuse for feeling stimulated but did not mean it.
This might seem scary, but it was like I woke up and felt that pins and needles feeling, all staticy, along my torso, from Helena Bonham Carter in her pretend anger. Then, I was in Alice in Wonderland with her running as a Queen with me like on my torso. I was feeling silly but not disgusting. It was as though that was when I first encountered her in the dream, though, somehow.
Later, I kept going up to her. It was nice. I guess she was rubbing my shoulder and like hugging me each time, each time a little different. I didn't feel that sorta metallic feeling, at all, more a mellow scratchy feeling. It was a bleak setting. I went out to run, with a big calendar by the day with little papers you can tear off or write in for something and leg lifts. The other thing was some opposite. For some reason, I still heard music and had a hard time. It was that way with my parents, too. I found in my ear were little microphones, rather headphones. I kept reaching in and pulling them out and became antsy because still no luck. So, I was being made fun of racially, I think. I went back to her and like drawled "mom" to her and put my arm around her waist, her pretend kind of waist, and she put her arm around me. Eventually, I was better.
There was one time, when she was pregnant, had a big stomach especially up and down, kinda fat like me. That was kinda sad for me because I had to go away. She already had 2 kids, though, so I dunno.
So, then, I guess we were at some sort of meeting. She was probably carrying me, yes, in a scary setting that was kinda demented I think. I know I was sleeping in bed with my brother, next to my grandma. She said my brother would be a girl indian, and he gave in, like heaved a sigh. I was worried my grandma would kill me. Her face was looking flat and rounded on the side like a mask and not very thick. She looked a bit unhealthy like me and shriveled. I was in bed with them twice. I called my brother a nigger virtually but indirectly just to make him feel better because I obviously was very mad, told my parents, who saw, and it worked. There was one time we were up, not many times, not much time, and my grandma was like slurping water from the ground. Her face was flat with a flat nose and mid section sticking out, her nose with another bump at an angle at her forehead. She smiled approvingly like she was tricking me. She was doing it for some reason I don't know. She was tricking, but it wasn't for me, I believe. :( That's what I wanted to think, that it wasn't at all for me.
So, I guess I was sorta eventually wallowing in my race to Helena Bonham Carter but in a mature way completely on my part and hers. I think she was picking me up|carrying me. I don't know how realistic it was, not very tangible. Eventually, it became a bit violent and she went away turning into a long, slim, tubey, somewhat thick, red dragon, but she came back and put her arm around me again a few times or for awhile.
So, the highlight was feeling a reaction from her without doing anything after feeling about 4 times pins and needles after I got mad about her and she entered my dream.
It was just so nice that I just kept feeling comfort from her, kept putting my arm around her, and she cuddled me really, pretty satisfying, safe, and consistent, yet in reality it was disgruntling. It was nice when she hugged me, too, made me feel just a little silly in a way. Nothing big. It was just nice, I mean, just that kinda tint.
She was totally accepting of me and totally free, no questions about it. I guess I was just feeling sick from the brain scan as aforementioned. I haven't been able to make a trip to the grocery store, neither. My dad was busy 3 days in a row I think 2 weeks ago, too, and haven't submitted to my last casting agency maybe or maybe some others. I have some hope for sometime. I've been feeling violent toward various factions but not bad, just imperfect. I'm sorta irritated, I guess.
So, it was just nice. I went up and put my arm around her and before the shower scene called her "mom" just because. It was the way the family was, whatever it was, in the dream. She was very comforting. How big was she to me? She was very big, not very tall. Sometimes, like a few inches taller. I just felt settled yet stimulated in a way that was okay and good each time. It was sorta like a spot, though, on the side, for some reason. I didn't think about it. Like, maybe almost a foot big.
*Sigh*
Ellen DeGeneres.
It's so nice to get close to her in my dreams and thoughts. I wonder what other people think of her? I'm still trying to think of a new Twitter name because it's required on her site and I was thinking of getting a more permanent one, in case you can't change it.
I wonder how other people see her. I see her for some reason as a very physical person.
Let's make up a story about her! I can make up stories about other people, too. :p
Hm... She's hosting a show. Like in a dream I had, she comes out and no one really wants to talk to her but I keep trekking her, like getting close but in some ways not feeling anything! * * * I'm not watching the show, anyway, but am backstage..
It's so nice to get close to her in my dreams and thoughts. I wonder what other people think of her? I'm still trying to think of a new Twitter name because it's required on her site and I was thinking of getting a more permanent one, in case you can't change it.
I wonder how other people see her. I see her for some reason as a very physical person.
Let's make up a story about her! I can make up stories about other people, too. :p
Hm... She's hosting a show. Like in a dream I had, she comes out and no one really wants to talk to her but I keep trekking her, like getting close but in some ways not feeling anything! * * * I'm not watching the show, anyway, but am backstage..
Dreams
I woke up once and forgot my dream.
It was something serious about Ellen DeGeneres telling people what to do. I probably got close to her.
I think it was rather harsh for me, don't remember what happened.
Maybe, I was just tired and thirsty. I was told to drink a lot after my brain scan with a needle in me I think injecting fluid. I took a shower when I woke up.
The memories are like at the tip of my tongue. I think Ellen DeGeneres was simply in charge.
It might have been a dim, warm-colored place, a bit harsh. I was in some turmoil of physical discomfort.
It was something serious about Ellen DeGeneres telling people what to do. I probably got close to her.
I think it was rather harsh for me, don't remember what happened.
Maybe, I was just tired and thirsty. I was told to drink a lot after my brain scan with a needle in me I think injecting fluid. I took a shower when I woke up.
The memories are like at the tip of my tongue. I think Ellen DeGeneres was simply in charge.
It might have been a dim, warm-colored place, a bit harsh. I was in some turmoil of physical discomfort.
My Forehead
That boy from New Orleans made my forehead feel tall, and more recently I felt it pop up again.
My Face Changing?
After I talked to my grandma, I had felt when I was talking to her that my face was like changed and not as detailed. It looked so detailed after I got my contacts. I had also been up all day singing.
Disrupting the Balance
Some things don't hit my nerve, and some things are going.
I can't get out of this mess.
Also, I was fine before Johnny Depp was famous.
I signed up for cross country and softball. The reason I liked drama so much was because my first year there was a boy there from the city, New Orleans. I guess he was gay and his friend died, but he was the most popular person when he was there and then left. It let the whole school down, secretly.
So... 8o
So, yea. I wasn't skinny enough, yet, though. The fat seemed to pop off me, though. I felt better when I stopped cross country but ran into a hard course and it brought my grades down. It was a big thing. I could have gotten by, but I was disrupted and called to the counselor. I also went to the mental hospital. I don't know if I would have changed schools, but I already changed my lifestyle. I could have easily but probably wouldn't. Also, if I wasn't recommended out of voice, I probably would have stayed in college or switched to another subject. They said I needed like lots of time at home, and I never went back. I'm stuck with a semester of F's from an online college. So, what happened was 2 friends visited me, and then they never talked to me again. I tried e-mailing them a lot. This was after.. Also, 1 friend's mom convinced me out of wanting to study on my own law and medicine. I was having a miserable life, though, but it just was disheartening to hear that from someone like her, like I did something wrong and she knew about it.
So, I wonder if that boy wasn't there what I'd look like. Also, my mom's mom came over. I never wrote to my cousin there, in Indonesia. So, I felt bad. I just forgot because it was so shocking and I had no fancy paper and my parents didn't like buying me anything it seemed, though my grandma complained every Christmas at a certain point that I had everything I needed. My mom's mom was here the semester before. My dad's mom came over the summer before I did bad in that one really hard class. I hadn't gone up north the prior summer to do some activities. I was in a community college. No, wait, I was working.
I thought I couldn't change. There was no ballet where I used to live, and I wasn't as healthy, anymore. I think my parents wish I went back into gymnastics and got mad I didn't after I took a break. Then, I couldn't be a cheerleader. I was gonna do dance team and backed out of flag team my 2nd year. I probably shouldn't have, but what about my joints?
Oh yea, I wanted to impress that boy, hoping he'd stay, but also my friend from San Fransisco didn't make it, so that's why I couldn't do it. I became well-liked that year, though. I became more devilishly reputed, though people didn't seem to realize that.
I guess I got fat because of the summer or something. I think I looked more like my mom's mom. I used to look more like the boy, not as fat.
Anyway, I could have done dance team and wish I did more physical activities.
I really now just feel attacked all the time and want to get out.
So, after my mom's mom came over, I didn't go up north to see my dad's mom.
So, I'm mad I got fat and looked different. I did, however, make the best of things but found myself out of it. Even my first day of school, I was obese.
I don't know why I looked so bad when I first came over. I looked worse when I left but not that bad and not fat. I had a more rounded look.
I probably should have done more physical activity, but it's funny I was already skinny. I just got a new workout DVD, like I said. It's ballet, dance, and Pilates. It's level 2. It does the whole body.
So, I dunno. I just went through the emotions and eventually took off, trouble with that class, which I thought to try out for Talented Theater and Talented Music and Talented Art ahead of time, very mad I didn't make Gifted until my 2nd year. The funny thing is no one wanted to move up a level from taking the advanced class until I went there, and suddenly everyone the grade ahead got in Gifted. I was the only one in Gifted in my grade in English. I was with one other girl in Math.
I think the cross country, though good, was too tedious. I should have also quit martial arts and tennis. I had fun with it, later, though, though it was a bit stressful. I still to this day prize, especially tennis, from starting a year and half ahead.
I wonder if I should have taken modern dance or harder ballet. I changed ballet schools but wish I went to a different one. The different one didn't have summer camp for my age after college.
I'm happy I did ballet. I got the DVD I did for workout because the girl on front looked best.
I can't get out of this mess.
Also, I was fine before Johnny Depp was famous.
I signed up for cross country and softball. The reason I liked drama so much was because my first year there was a boy there from the city, New Orleans. I guess he was gay and his friend died, but he was the most popular person when he was there and then left. It let the whole school down, secretly.
So... 8o
So, yea. I wasn't skinny enough, yet, though. The fat seemed to pop off me, though. I felt better when I stopped cross country but ran into a hard course and it brought my grades down. It was a big thing. I could have gotten by, but I was disrupted and called to the counselor. I also went to the mental hospital. I don't know if I would have changed schools, but I already changed my lifestyle. I could have easily but probably wouldn't. Also, if I wasn't recommended out of voice, I probably would have stayed in college or switched to another subject. They said I needed like lots of time at home, and I never went back. I'm stuck with a semester of F's from an online college. So, what happened was 2 friends visited me, and then they never talked to me again. I tried e-mailing them a lot. This was after.. Also, 1 friend's mom convinced me out of wanting to study on my own law and medicine. I was having a miserable life, though, but it just was disheartening to hear that from someone like her, like I did something wrong and she knew about it.
So, I wonder if that boy wasn't there what I'd look like. Also, my mom's mom came over. I never wrote to my cousin there, in Indonesia. So, I felt bad. I just forgot because it was so shocking and I had no fancy paper and my parents didn't like buying me anything it seemed, though my grandma complained every Christmas at a certain point that I had everything I needed. My mom's mom was here the semester before. My dad's mom came over the summer before I did bad in that one really hard class. I hadn't gone up north the prior summer to do some activities. I was in a community college. No, wait, I was working.
I thought I couldn't change. There was no ballet where I used to live, and I wasn't as healthy, anymore. I think my parents wish I went back into gymnastics and got mad I didn't after I took a break. Then, I couldn't be a cheerleader. I was gonna do dance team and backed out of flag team my 2nd year. I probably shouldn't have, but what about my joints?
Oh yea, I wanted to impress that boy, hoping he'd stay, but also my friend from San Fransisco didn't make it, so that's why I couldn't do it. I became well-liked that year, though. I became more devilishly reputed, though people didn't seem to realize that.
I guess I got fat because of the summer or something. I think I looked more like my mom's mom. I used to look more like the boy, not as fat.
Anyway, I could have done dance team and wish I did more physical activities.
I really now just feel attacked all the time and want to get out.
So, after my mom's mom came over, I didn't go up north to see my dad's mom.
So, I'm mad I got fat and looked different. I did, however, make the best of things but found myself out of it. Even my first day of school, I was obese.
I don't know why I looked so bad when I first came over. I looked worse when I left but not that bad and not fat. I had a more rounded look.
I probably should have done more physical activity, but it's funny I was already skinny. I just got a new workout DVD, like I said. It's ballet, dance, and Pilates. It's level 2. It does the whole body.
So, I dunno. I just went through the emotions and eventually took off, trouble with that class, which I thought to try out for Talented Theater and Talented Music and Talented Art ahead of time, very mad I didn't make Gifted until my 2nd year. The funny thing is no one wanted to move up a level from taking the advanced class until I went there, and suddenly everyone the grade ahead got in Gifted. I was the only one in Gifted in my grade in English. I was with one other girl in Math.
I think the cross country, though good, was too tedious. I should have also quit martial arts and tennis. I had fun with it, later, though, though it was a bit stressful. I still to this day prize, especially tennis, from starting a year and half ahead.
I wonder if I should have taken modern dance or harder ballet. I changed ballet schools but wish I went to a different one. The different one didn't have summer camp for my age after college.
I'm happy I did ballet. I got the DVD I did for workout because the girl on front looked best.
I know that people influence others's thoughts that don't make sense, and it was all like made up to begin with.
I do care about everyone, but I don't believe in hurting people mercilessly and believe that someone causes someone to do something like that.
It's hard for me to get into something that someone doesn't really think..
I just believe that some people are worse than others, and it's usually a battle of race.
I do care about everyone, but I don't believe in hurting people mercilessly and believe that someone causes someone to do something like that.
It's hard for me to get into something that someone doesn't really think..
I just believe that some people are worse than others, and it's usually a battle of race.
NO ONE WILL LISTEN TO ME!
They just keep at me. They like to ignore my points.
Why can't my life be normal?
Why can't my life be normal?
"Charlie and the Chocolate Factory"
I feel like Charlie in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
People think you're not a good person if you're better than them and probably create race as some reason.
I really just feel worn down from being beat at and in recovery from my whole life and not having a proper recovery!
People think you're not a good person if you're better than them and probably create race as some reason.
I really just feel worn down from being beat at and in recovery from my whole life and not having a proper recovery!
Using People..
People will sacrifice to sorta hurt someone else in some way to get their attention from someone else but make them accept it.
My Parents
They were supposed to provide me with an environment that was normal for living.
I can get close to other people in the world and try to raise my status in some way.
I can get close to other people in the world and try to raise my status in some way.
Another Point
I really don't care about other people.
I will not base my life around their problems as though it's something cool and then descend into it and create more problems of my own, as though it were fate.
I will not base my life around their problems as though it's something cool and then descend into it and create more problems of my own, as though it were fate.
}:[
In the conversation...
I don't think I'm a bad person, that I could change into one. That's not true!
I don't think I'm a bad person, that I could change into one. That's not true!
Weird People
I take it some people don't go through things like they matter and make fun of you if you do.
I guess people just get jealous and forget how mean they are.
I guess people just get jealous and forget how mean they are.
Changing Things
I don't know why people make up reasons for things when things are important otherwise..
I don't really change things when something goes wrong that's because of a very uncomfortable situation.
I don't really change things when something goes wrong that's because of a very uncomfortable situation.
Ellen DeGeneres
"Ellen DeGeneres is gay." Why does that fit? I realized she pushed her show back to go to church on Sundays, but I don't think she's Christina.. Then, 8o, what did I just realize? Oh, I wandered off-topic and was thinking that something not nice I guess that I thought was like so nice it didn't matter but didn't really seem nice for some reason. Oh yea, everyone in New Oreans is gay. :p Not literally, yes literally. Some people don't live there, anymore. I've had several notable people in my life from there. One boy from there was gay, and he's what caused me to change back into my old self, again, but I changed out of it, again.
Johnny Depp
Johnny Depp is mean to people who post online.
I've had problems being on the internet!!!!
I've had problems being on the internet!!!!
LEAVE ME ALONE!
I'm not retarded. I don't think people who are nice to me should be pretended to be bad, at all. Then you wouldn't deserve anything!
Punished for Accidents and Things Not Illegal Caused By Others
I don't understand why when I get confused and make a mistake people think I need to suffer "what" they do for really being bad.
Twitter @reneesmusings
Wow, you like Broadway|jazz, too? When I went to school in New Orleans, the jazz was very different, very Mickey Mouse, as the entire New Orleans area was in comparison to originally being from Southeastern and Northeastern Florida.
There used to be a theme park that opened on my birthday and closed after Hurricane Katrina. There was a show there that was so cute that had singing and dancing.
Tracie Bennett seems like a cool person. She seems kinda like she's from NYC, which seems like a nice place, though it's not really a place I desire to be in. That's a nice song I heard of her on YouTube that sounds like from .... Meet Me in Saint Louis. I had a teacher in New Orleans from Saint Louis. He had black hair. Attractive men with black hair, like everyone, actually allure me, but most of them aren't quite of the stereotype I'd envision.
I see you grew up in Rochester... I was up there one summer with my aunt and cousin. I went to a Bible camp, and it was nice. My ancestors are from northwestern Pennsylvania. I know my grandma is from Cyclone... I know they got thick, luscious snow. My grandma and other relatives live in Southwestern New York, at the border but not near the very Western coast.
I'm not from there, though, obviously.
I met a nice girl from NYC who's originally as a toddler from Atlanta, Chloë Moretz. She was in a Tim Burton movie. I started talking to her just before she started because I saw Justin Bieber on a late night show and he seemed to want to be Tweeted, but his Tweets are long and random. Lots of people have Twitters named after them but don't post with them.. :( So, anyway, I eventually stopped Tweeting a few famous mostly kids every day. People like Johnny Depp got off Twitter. I think I Tweeted this girl until the movie stopped. I ended up feeling bad about it yet obligated yet distrusted, like I didn't matter, that I had to Tweet all these people but wasn't worthy of doing it for this very attractive girl, who became an actress when she was young, though still I know goes to NYC. She's very nice. She understands everything, doesn't mess around.
I watch "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" every day and like Tweet all her daily Tweets. 8) So, she's from the New Orleans area, and it's nice to connect to her. I don't know why she seems so different. I found in a crack of the internet more about her heritage, that her dad isn't from the U.S. Her mom is from New Orleans, and they moved to a suburb after her brother was born. I think she lived in more Southwestern of New Orleans..
Anyway, so, I noticed that Chloë Moretz seems innocent because funny no one told me to stop Tweeting her all this time. Eventually, Taylor Swift led me to Ellen DeGeneres, who was fun but hard to warm up to, I guess you'd say... There was something wrong with me, and she's gay, too. I watched Finding Nemo 3D on opening, too....
* * *
So, anyway, I noticed you're a very contained person. ^00^ I guess I should go into why. I was just thinking of what it was like for me living in somewhere other than Pennsylvania and Southwestern New York state. It was in the South. I just feel that things mean more than people here can tell.
Here are some good recordings of me singing:
Perhaps, you'd be more interested in "Prima Donna." I highlighted in red the ones that are worth watching. :o
Leaving on a Jet Plane - Sep. 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7datoltyr0&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Downtown - Sep. 4
Just listen to the 1st one..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sp5zgSqM5c&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
O Waly Waly - Sep. 9
up to 1:32
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UF4h2F3mj6g&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
12 Days of Christmas - Sep. 11
3:13 on
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgfTOXbb_Dc&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Ding Dong Merrily on High - Sep. 11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyU3RsGG2Dc&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
If I Had a Hammer - Sep. 11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNthN1S5kY8&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
500 Miles - Sep. 11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wn5qC2JGZSo&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
*Total Eclipse of the Heart - Sep. 11
2:27 on
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1JG9frCLRjw&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
500 Miles - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=akNwPmdqH14&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
*Ding Dong Merrily on High - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXROSHT5bbM&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
I'm Bringing Home a Baby Bumblebee - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=caSevX4pdXA&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
If I Had a Hammer - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4Er523JV4o&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
500 Miles - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dP8VFW68gGI&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Part of Your World - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4CvhN44c_8&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Ding Dong Merrily on High - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGFFlIkza9g&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
I'm Bringing Home a Baby Bumblebee - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90s8mnnF3_g&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Total Eclipse of the Heart - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GD6VS9tgd0w&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Edelweiss - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwrF_6gH3vY&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Prima Donna - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0MSX_igt5Y&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Prima Donna - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sL2PpRqoAIQ&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
I'm cutting my hair tonight, hopefully, with bangs and angles. :) If I don't like it, I can let it grow.
I noticed the kinds of things people like you notice, basically.. "focused, physically exhausting (even for the viewer) and brilliant performance." Physically exhausting? After I worked out a lot and sang I was sweating when I was performing and recording several songs in front of a camera. 8o
"What's better than a day at the beach? A whole week! First real holiday since I can remember, and it's heaven. I may never come back!" It was fun growing up in Southeastern and Northeastern Florida. We went to the beach about twice a month and visited my aunts and played in the sprinklers I guess like seemed every weekend. My vacations were always spent visiting relatives. I've had friends who could walk to the beach in Northeastern Florida. It's not really like Georgia, at all, obviously. 8o I don't think I'd care anymore to be out in nature on the beach for that long. 8o Living in Orlando is like being on the beach, just without the sand and water.. I feel like the richest person in the world, but I don't go to Disney World, no not that often. I always thought I'd come back after I went to Florida. I guess, being in Florida, I feel stripped of my bare essentials and am quite a pure person, sorta on my own accord. Things could have been better if I figured things out. 80 In some ways, living in a rugged place like this, not all prim and proper, you do feel kinda gruff, somehow, or maybe that's also from the hard times when I lived somewhere else. 8| I guess up there you know about the idea of never taking off work and like working extra hours. I don't see how a job can be that much fun, really. I certainly didn't eat, sleep, and breath music, but I was alwayus doing someting productive. ^99^ It is indeed good to use a break. I spend a lot of time at home sorta fixing my life. You know what that means, I guess... I guess a lot of people are jealous of different areas. You should make the best of what you have, like I do and have been. I couldn't be happier. 0:) I was telling Ellen DeGeneres via Twitter that I couldn't imagine never leaving Florida. In a way, I could, but I would probably move at 18. I didn't really understand the people who went to my school in New Orleans. Some more flashy people were supposed to be there. I find that people in places like L.A. or Florida, while contained, possess silly ideas. I think in Orlando, apparently.. they're like kinda more into people physically than whereas I got the feeling before that it was about ideas and general thoughts. I did an audition at the airport, and it was such a breath of fresh air to see "people who live up north." Like, they were from maybe the midwest. Maybe NYC.. ^99^?
When I was looking up Julie Andrews, I came across Celtic Women and even saw a concert by Orla Fallon, the one with the dyed red hair and I think really brown eyes: http://youtu.be/KGpTkv713vQ Anyway, you know, this song was very popular in Florida, I know.. Here's Kate Bush, if anyone is interested. She is also born in 1958: http://youtu.be/W5wc1R0AQ_M.
So, Mrs. Renee Fleming, you liked javelin? I don't know, wait I think I did a lot of that one. I also did some shot put, or wait also a lot of discus. I didn't compete. This was my first year. I also did softball and had a good picture. I accompanied the senior play, was asked to by a student, just ended up doing mostly one note lines... However, the picture wasn't in the yearbook. I thought I saw it in the yearbook, and then I think I looked again and it was gone. It was so unbelievably good. I have a picture of me from ballet from around then, but it's not really as good. I only did softball my first year. There wasn't any ballet wen I was a certain age, and then I couldn't do softball, neither, didn't have it, but when my brother did tennis I started, as well. When we moved, I also took martial arts at the same school, as him. I would think everyone would enjoy hurtles, most, but I tripped every time I did it. I had gotten short all of a sudden, when I moved. I was short in school to start with, though. I could have kept growing, I know. I wanted to. After awhile, I thought it was neat to be short for ballet. I had done gymnastics but not on a team growing up and did stuff at home.
http://www.wnyc.org/shows/heresthething/2012/may/21/#.T7wGE-7g--I.facebook Nice interview. I can't really remember what you said ... and I was just sorta listening to the feelings.
So, I was thinking, I do like classical singing. I guess it was more about being poor and lacking transportation, though I was taken to piano lessons. My grandma gave us a car. My mom put me in choir when I told her I wanted to sing at 7. I started getting into music somehow in 1st grade. We did whales and were on TV. I liked Free Willy and Michael Jackson. It was a lyrical, general song. We never listened to opera nor many musicals, just sorta that pop music.. not sure why, though. :| It as okay. I wasn't a wild girl, so I don't hold in experiences like that from the past. I would just figure things out.. I grew up and become more emotional or expressive. I'm pretty mad no one will think like me nor listen to me nor figure things out. I feel that means getting out of my house. I wanted to go to a class once a week from a diction teacher, but it's too long and not worth asking my dad to take me. Not sure why. I was late, anyway, probably. I found a good workout DVD, though, a level 2 ballet Pilates dance program that seems to tone the whole body pretty shapely. I always felt like I was in trouble. I think when I was a baby maybe I wasn't nice because I was treated like a nigger. I think I just was uncomfortable and confused, didn't plot out anything bad against anyone. I don't believe people are allowed to make me do the wrong thing because I messed up. They messed up, too. I think I wasn't as bad as I was made out to be, at first, neither. I think I was better and more mistreated by the world because people were both jealous and racist of me. You find out things as you go along, but there are some things you know to be true already like of what to feel. So, anyway, it was very hard for me. I guess I wanted to be more closed up to the world as an infant. I don't know why my parents tried to be so open with me. I really don't. I wasn't. Then, my brother came along and I got in trouble for having an attitude. However, I grew up as the dubbed complainer, though I was just explaining my world, about people being mean to me. I guess my parents were testing me to be like other people in certain ways, like in the bad ways, to be cool, but I don't that, and certainly neither do they. Only to me. Well, my mom is Chinese-Indonesian, and my dad has Native American and I think Polish-Jewish and Swiss-Jewish migrated to Germany. I notice ... your last husband's last name was Ross, and I recently found it was a family name. I have several Norman-based name, and Barrett is actually Norman-Welsh-Irish. Also, I'm actually pretty mad my brother feels so good because I'm his sister and with me it's the opposite. He's in college, and I was unable to finish it and was told not to take voice, anymore from being inhibited. I don't really care about people. I am a success. I was already told that in all my endeavors.
So, I'm glad things are going good for you now. You're a really good singer, my favorite and maybe the most skilled. :)
There used to be a theme park that opened on my birthday and closed after Hurricane Katrina. There was a show there that was so cute that had singing and dancing.
Tracie Bennett seems like a cool person. She seems kinda like she's from NYC, which seems like a nice place, though it's not really a place I desire to be in. That's a nice song I heard of her on YouTube that sounds like from .... Meet Me in Saint Louis. I had a teacher in New Orleans from Saint Louis. He had black hair. Attractive men with black hair, like everyone, actually allure me, but most of them aren't quite of the stereotype I'd envision.
I see you grew up in Rochester... I was up there one summer with my aunt and cousin. I went to a Bible camp, and it was nice. My ancestors are from northwestern Pennsylvania. I know my grandma is from Cyclone... I know they got thick, luscious snow. My grandma and other relatives live in Southwestern New York, at the border but not near the very Western coast.
I'm not from there, though, obviously.
I met a nice girl from NYC who's originally as a toddler from Atlanta, Chloë Moretz. She was in a Tim Burton movie. I started talking to her just before she started because I saw Justin Bieber on a late night show and he seemed to want to be Tweeted, but his Tweets are long and random. Lots of people have Twitters named after them but don't post with them.. :( So, anyway, I eventually stopped Tweeting a few famous mostly kids every day. People like Johnny Depp got off Twitter. I think I Tweeted this girl until the movie stopped. I ended up feeling bad about it yet obligated yet distrusted, like I didn't matter, that I had to Tweet all these people but wasn't worthy of doing it for this very attractive girl, who became an actress when she was young, though still I know goes to NYC. She's very nice. She understands everything, doesn't mess around.
I watch "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" every day and like Tweet all her daily Tweets. 8) So, she's from the New Orleans area, and it's nice to connect to her. I don't know why she seems so different. I found in a crack of the internet more about her heritage, that her dad isn't from the U.S. Her mom is from New Orleans, and they moved to a suburb after her brother was born. I think she lived in more Southwestern of New Orleans..
Anyway, so, I noticed that Chloë Moretz seems innocent because funny no one told me to stop Tweeting her all this time. Eventually, Taylor Swift led me to Ellen DeGeneres, who was fun but hard to warm up to, I guess you'd say... There was something wrong with me, and she's gay, too. I watched Finding Nemo 3D on opening, too....
* * *
So, anyway, I noticed you're a very contained person. ^00^ I guess I should go into why. I was just thinking of what it was like for me living in somewhere other than Pennsylvania and Southwestern New York state. It was in the South. I just feel that things mean more than people here can tell.
Here are some good recordings of me singing:
Perhaps, you'd be more interested in "Prima Donna." I highlighted in red the ones that are worth watching. :o
Leaving on a Jet Plane - Sep. 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7datoltyr0&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Downtown - Sep. 4
Just listen to the 1st one..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8sp5zgSqM5c&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
O Waly Waly - Sep. 9
up to 1:32
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UF4h2F3mj6g&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
12 Days of Christmas - Sep. 11
3:13 on
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mgfTOXbb_Dc&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Ding Dong Merrily on High - Sep. 11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyU3RsGG2Dc&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
If I Had a Hammer - Sep. 11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNthN1S5kY8&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
500 Miles - Sep. 11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wn5qC2JGZSo&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
*Total Eclipse of the Heart - Sep. 11
2:27 on
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1JG9frCLRjw&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
500 Miles - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=akNwPmdqH14&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
*Ding Dong Merrily on High - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FXROSHT5bbM&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
I'm Bringing Home a Baby Bumblebee - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=caSevX4pdXA&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
If I Had a Hammer - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o4Er523JV4o&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
500 Miles - Sep. 12
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dP8VFW68gGI&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Part of Your World - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4CvhN44c_8&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Ding Dong Merrily on High - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGFFlIkza9g&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
I'm Bringing Home a Baby Bumblebee - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=90s8mnnF3_g&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Total Eclipse of the Heart - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GD6VS9tgd0w&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Edelweiss - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwrF_6gH3vY&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Prima Donna - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0MSX_igt5Y&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
Prima Donna - Sep. 14
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sL2PpRqoAIQ&feature=share&list=PLxPGjI9BRSVaTVaAsuL3v95fgXXV4w_XW
I'm cutting my hair tonight, hopefully, with bangs and angles. :) If I don't like it, I can let it grow.
I noticed the kinds of things people like you notice, basically.. "focused, physically exhausting (even for the viewer) and brilliant performance." Physically exhausting? After I worked out a lot and sang I was sweating when I was performing and recording several songs in front of a camera. 8o
"What's better than a day at the beach? A whole week! First real holiday since I can remember, and it's heaven. I may never come back!" It was fun growing up in Southeastern and Northeastern Florida. We went to the beach about twice a month and visited my aunts and played in the sprinklers I guess like seemed every weekend. My vacations were always spent visiting relatives. I've had friends who could walk to the beach in Northeastern Florida. It's not really like Georgia, at all, obviously. 8o I don't think I'd care anymore to be out in nature on the beach for that long. 8o Living in Orlando is like being on the beach, just without the sand and water.. I feel like the richest person in the world, but I don't go to Disney World, no not that often. I always thought I'd come back after I went to Florida. I guess, being in Florida, I feel stripped of my bare essentials and am quite a pure person, sorta on my own accord. Things could have been better if I figured things out. 80 In some ways, living in a rugged place like this, not all prim and proper, you do feel kinda gruff, somehow, or maybe that's also from the hard times when I lived somewhere else. 8| I guess up there you know about the idea of never taking off work and like working extra hours. I don't see how a job can be that much fun, really. I certainly didn't eat, sleep, and breath music, but I was alwayus doing someting productive. ^99^ It is indeed good to use a break. I spend a lot of time at home sorta fixing my life. You know what that means, I guess... I guess a lot of people are jealous of different areas. You should make the best of what you have, like I do and have been. I couldn't be happier. 0:) I was telling Ellen DeGeneres via Twitter that I couldn't imagine never leaving Florida. In a way, I could, but I would probably move at 18. I didn't really understand the people who went to my school in New Orleans. Some more flashy people were supposed to be there. I find that people in places like L.A. or Florida, while contained, possess silly ideas. I think in Orlando, apparently.. they're like kinda more into people physically than whereas I got the feeling before that it was about ideas and general thoughts. I did an audition at the airport, and it was such a breath of fresh air to see "people who live up north." Like, they were from maybe the midwest. Maybe NYC.. ^99^?
When I was looking up Julie Andrews, I came across Celtic Women and even saw a concert by Orla Fallon, the one with the dyed red hair and I think really brown eyes: http://youtu.be/KGpTkv713vQ Anyway, you know, this song was very popular in Florida, I know.. Here's Kate Bush, if anyone is interested. She is also born in 1958: http://youtu.be/W5wc1R0AQ_M.
So, Mrs. Renee Fleming, you liked javelin? I don't know, wait I think I did a lot of that one. I also did some shot put, or wait also a lot of discus. I didn't compete. This was my first year. I also did softball and had a good picture. I accompanied the senior play, was asked to by a student, just ended up doing mostly one note lines... However, the picture wasn't in the yearbook. I thought I saw it in the yearbook, and then I think I looked again and it was gone. It was so unbelievably good. I have a picture of me from ballet from around then, but it's not really as good. I only did softball my first year. There wasn't any ballet wen I was a certain age, and then I couldn't do softball, neither, didn't have it, but when my brother did tennis I started, as well. When we moved, I also took martial arts at the same school, as him. I would think everyone would enjoy hurtles, most, but I tripped every time I did it. I had gotten short all of a sudden, when I moved. I was short in school to start with, though. I could have kept growing, I know. I wanted to. After awhile, I thought it was neat to be short for ballet. I had done gymnastics but not on a team growing up and did stuff at home.
http://www.wnyc.org/shows/heresthething/2012/may/21/#.T7wGE-7g--I.facebook Nice interview. I can't really remember what you said ... and I was just sorta listening to the feelings.
So, I was thinking, I do like classical singing. I guess it was more about being poor and lacking transportation, though I was taken to piano lessons. My grandma gave us a car. My mom put me in choir when I told her I wanted to sing at 7. I started getting into music somehow in 1st grade. We did whales and were on TV. I liked Free Willy and Michael Jackson. It was a lyrical, general song. We never listened to opera nor many musicals, just sorta that pop music.. not sure why, though. :| It as okay. I wasn't a wild girl, so I don't hold in experiences like that from the past. I would just figure things out.. I grew up and become more emotional or expressive. I'm pretty mad no one will think like me nor listen to me nor figure things out. I feel that means getting out of my house. I wanted to go to a class once a week from a diction teacher, but it's too long and not worth asking my dad to take me. Not sure why. I was late, anyway, probably. I found a good workout DVD, though, a level 2 ballet Pilates dance program that seems to tone the whole body pretty shapely. I always felt like I was in trouble. I think when I was a baby maybe I wasn't nice because I was treated like a nigger. I think I just was uncomfortable and confused, didn't plot out anything bad against anyone. I don't believe people are allowed to make me do the wrong thing because I messed up. They messed up, too. I think I wasn't as bad as I was made out to be, at first, neither. I think I was better and more mistreated by the world because people were both jealous and racist of me. You find out things as you go along, but there are some things you know to be true already like of what to feel. So, anyway, it was very hard for me. I guess I wanted to be more closed up to the world as an infant. I don't know why my parents tried to be so open with me. I really don't. I wasn't. Then, my brother came along and I got in trouble for having an attitude. However, I grew up as the dubbed complainer, though I was just explaining my world, about people being mean to me. I guess my parents were testing me to be like other people in certain ways, like in the bad ways, to be cool, but I don't that, and certainly neither do they. Only to me. Well, my mom is Chinese-Indonesian, and my dad has Native American and I think Polish-Jewish and Swiss-Jewish migrated to Germany. I notice ... your last husband's last name was Ross, and I recently found it was a family name. I have several Norman-based name, and Barrett is actually Norman-Welsh-Irish. Also, I'm actually pretty mad my brother feels so good because I'm his sister and with me it's the opposite. He's in college, and I was unable to finish it and was told not to take voice, anymore from being inhibited. I don't really care about people. I am a success. I was already told that in all my endeavors.
So, I'm glad things are going good for you now. You're a really good singer, my favorite and maybe the most skilled. :)
i ALSO
I ALSO DON'T SIT THERE AND ARGUE ABOUT IF SOMEONE SHOULD COPY ME A CERTAIN WAY WHEN I ALREADY FEEL ALL IN THE RIGHT FOR A MOMENT ABOUT IT.
Losing Traits
You shouldn't lose something if you don't look cool doing it.
Also, I didn't use something at first in my example, in thinking.
Also, I didn't use something at first in my example, in thinking.
Listening to Bad People
So, if we do something wrong, we listen to bad people, like the reality doesn't connect?
I forgot what else I was going to say.
I forgot what else I was going to say.
Bad Values Supported
Pretty much, there are values in the world that would lead to bad things happening..
Hurting You
People like to act like they're protecting others hurting you, like they'll want to hurt you, anyway.
Europeans - Out of Juice
Europeans destroyed themselves out of hatred for other races and hid from the world.
SO LEAVE ME ALONE AND DON'T GET JEALOUS AND ACT ON THAT.
SO LEAVE ME ALONE AND DON'T GET JEALOUS AND ACT ON THAT.
People Who Grew Up in California..
Why do like people from California think they're the only ones who can do something?
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